Realised make me growth

I was realized something today, luckily, I realized it today!! Nothing is too late, I have only doubt about it for around 9 months, luckily…is not 1 year!! Now…everything seems so clear for me!! Obviously, I’m not happy!! Of course, what I thought for these months has been gone in just a few minutes!! No point for me to smile…...

A lot of things is keep running in my mind, pressure start entangle me!! I just can’t control and calm down myself…… Again, at last……I realized, I am just a NORMAL people in the world!! I am not expressive, I don’t even know how to express my feeling…… For those things that I don’t know much, I always use my own way to look for the answer! And, it works!! During my studies life, I don’t know much…but I always use my own way to seek for the answer without ask for clarification from lecture/tutor!! Most all the time, my judgment is really works……but, when people come and ask me how do I found the answer, but I can’t really answer them, even I know how to it!! Because, I just know what I know……the detail or reason, I really don’t know!!

Come to work, I am same as last time…when come to the things I am not sure, again, I will use my judgment to think and provide an answer. But, I discovered that with a lot of uncertainties, the things is really can’t works!! Because, what I have is “I not sure”, “I think”, “It should be”, “I thought”, and UNCERTAINTIES……. I am afraid to clarify the things that I don’t know, I not sure, and I doubt about from people!! Hahahahah……I just can’t stop myself to laugh myself!! I AM SICK OF IT……HELP!!

Okay, back to normal. With this, I found that I was lost in somewhere……But, I discover something which is very important in my life!! I told myself:

Anything I don’t know -- ASK

Anything that I am not sure -- ASK

Anything that I am in doubt -- ASK

What are the things that I want to complete by today, by this month, this quarter, this year, 5th year, 10th year, 20th years, and this life?!

You will see a brand new me again, with my wonderful gentle smile!! This is just a stage, just an obstacle which happened in my life to make me growth from every fell down.


11-06-09 9.42pm

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Today, a brand new day for me……I woke up in an early morning, and had a very nice breakfast without rushing!! A wonderful day for me, yes, I make my day…..just because I believe what I have believed!! A mission for myself, cheers my life up!!

12-06-09 9.27am